I’m back. We’re back. I’ve had a hell of time. I’m not out of the woods yet, but the urge to write again confirms that I have finally begun to move forward. I got hit hard; most days, I find myself still bewildered by the cruelty and wickedness that hit my family, my marriage, and my life. There are things I want to put behind me, but there are also things I do not want to forget.
I refuse to shut down our family memories, especially for my kids. There are still so many stories to share, big and small, and so many milestones in spite of the ugliness recently. Like Laz learning how to swim this summer, and Alo joining his first toddler class, and moving into a new house I love. I don’t want that cloud to keep hanging over our lives, defining our present days or our future. And these days have been lovely, and blessed, in spite of everything. I want my kids to still have this space online, so that my boys can laugh, and giggle, and reminisce about how we once were. I want my sons to remember that we continued to love and to thrive – that they did not break us.
Thus, Blue Roundabout. Roundabout because life has been circuitous lately. And Blue as a tribute to our old blog; it doesn’t quite feel right to revive it. After all, that world is not our world anymore, not exactly. Our family has changed. So this is something new. Not precisely a rebirth, but a continuation of sorts. Altered, but still here. Just like my family.